Social drama, name of the game in this coffee small town. Maybe in any small town. Quite confusing for an introverted Brit accustomed to under-statement vs exaggeration and story telling.
Really, Spanish lessons and google-translate help a lot with the language part; This other translation thing is much more challenging.
Gradually, I am learning to translate latin drama into Anglo. I anticipate what fun it is going to be once I have mastered this. I intend to entertain myself by practicing my own hand waving, hissy fits and tall stories.
Here are some insights and anecdotes. I am concerned some people might read this and think I am talking about them, singling them out. Worry not, it seems to be ubiquitous. Everyone will think that. There is safety in numbers here and it all happens all the time. I am the odd one out not you.
Husband terribly ill, taken to his bed, sick with nerves over the financial consequences of farming ups and downs; Or respectful wife's elaborate excuse for not going out this weekend?
Gentleman getting very excited mid conversation. A little bit like my four year old having a tantrum, only done with flare and pride. It involved hand waving and quoting family traditions over generations. It was triggered when I had asked about public rights of ways over his land; Or was it really an elaborate way of changing the subject, rather not talk about this today or any other?
Stories or rumors with legs. Usually, inspired by truth but wandering off for the sake of a good story. Often these involve guns, drug dealers, beautiful women, extra marital sex - all the same things you find on TV, but here we like our characters to have real life names.
If it looks like a 'common' mans way of bringing folks down to a comprehensible and manageable size - then it is too convenient and probably more story than truth. She is good looking (she has boyfriends); He is rich (got it from drug money) and so on.
Sometimes, it takes the form of maids Chinese whispers. Little tit bits of how the other half live that are passed from maid to maid, until eventually the story gets back into your social circle. Sometimes this is done in a great demonstration of loyalty to you... you know I heard this or that. Or sometimes just offered as a juicy tit bit with some social value.
In these scenarios, marriages are all on the brink and most people's sex lives are off the bell curve. 'Don't talk in-front of the servants' is as good advice today as it was 100 yrs ago where I come from.
With so much drama, there is another sort of equal and opposite activity. It is called rumor control or reputation management. You can do it for yourself or for someone else as a way you can demonstrate your friendship and loyalty.
I have found myself defending people from time to time. Just could not help myself. The accusation just seemed so unlikely. In my case, not a deliberate strategy just an observation that I seem to be doing this thing instinctively and relatively often.
As for managing my own: Can't be bothered with it myself. Actions speak louder than words, lets get on with some life here and let them think what they may.
Just one consistent exception to the rule. He has a lovely family but has girlfriends you know. Well, I think that is mostly true. How would I know? Good question.
Really, Spanish lessons and google-translate help a lot with the language part; This other translation thing is much more challenging.
Gradually, I am learning to translate latin drama into Anglo. I anticipate what fun it is going to be once I have mastered this. I intend to entertain myself by practicing my own hand waving, hissy fits and tall stories.
Here are some insights and anecdotes. I am concerned some people might read this and think I am talking about them, singling them out. Worry not, it seems to be ubiquitous. Everyone will think that. There is safety in numbers here and it all happens all the time. I am the odd one out not you.
Husband terribly ill, taken to his bed, sick with nerves over the financial consequences of farming ups and downs; Or respectful wife's elaborate excuse for not going out this weekend?
Gentleman getting very excited mid conversation. A little bit like my four year old having a tantrum, only done with flare and pride. It involved hand waving and quoting family traditions over generations. It was triggered when I had asked about public rights of ways over his land; Or was it really an elaborate way of changing the subject, rather not talk about this today or any other?
Stories or rumors with legs. Usually, inspired by truth but wandering off for the sake of a good story. Often these involve guns, drug dealers, beautiful women, extra marital sex - all the same things you find on TV, but here we like our characters to have real life names.
If it looks like a 'common' mans way of bringing folks down to a comprehensible and manageable size - then it is too convenient and probably more story than truth. She is good looking (she has boyfriends); He is rich (got it from drug money) and so on.
Sometimes, it takes the form of maids Chinese whispers. Little tit bits of how the other half live that are passed from maid to maid, until eventually the story gets back into your social circle. Sometimes this is done in a great demonstration of loyalty to you... you know I heard this or that. Or sometimes just offered as a juicy tit bit with some social value.
In these scenarios, marriages are all on the brink and most people's sex lives are off the bell curve. 'Don't talk in-front of the servants' is as good advice today as it was 100 yrs ago where I come from.
With so much drama, there is another sort of equal and opposite activity. It is called rumor control or reputation management. You can do it for yourself or for someone else as a way you can demonstrate your friendship and loyalty.
I have found myself defending people from time to time. Just could not help myself. The accusation just seemed so unlikely. In my case, not a deliberate strategy just an observation that I seem to be doing this thing instinctively and relatively often.
As for managing my own: Can't be bothered with it myself. Actions speak louder than words, lets get on with some life here and let them think what they may.
Just one consistent exception to the rule. He has a lovely family but has girlfriends you know. Well, I think that is mostly true. How would I know? Good question.
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